


Dear Boy

by rainy_fangirl



Series: Affairs of the Heart [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: 4+1 Things, Cheating, F/M, I put off writing this, Inspired by Real Events, Letters, New Year's Resolutions, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Working Out My Feelings Through Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 00:53:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13224780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainy_fangirl/pseuds/rainy_fangirl
Summary: I was sad for a long time, you gave me anxiety and I gave you all my love.





	Dear Boy

Dear Boy,

You always seemed like the ‘boy next door’ type, even though you were only next to me for forty-five minutes every day for only three or so days. I don’t want to miss those times, it was just class, after all, we barely talked, I was surprised I remembered your name. Those were the days when I wasn’t a blushing mess, when you couldn’t bring me to your knees with only a wink. I was an island last year. 

Signed,

The Other Girl

 

Dear Boy,

I can’t believe I let this, let you, happen to me. I can’t believe I didn’t know about her, that I could be so blind. For fuck’s sake, she was your girlfriend and I was just….just. It’s not like I can just forget you, it’s not that easy. You weren’t mine, I wasn’t yours, and I hate myself more than she ever could. You weren’t my first cheater, you won’t be my last. I know that, at least. But I also know that you’re just a little taller than me, with hair that’s composed of shades of blonde and brown, ice-colored eyes not unlike my own. I know that your birthday is August fourteenth and your grandmother died last year and you wanted to learn Russian for her and that every summer you go to Jamaica with your family and you work in your father’s office for extra cash. I know that you’re on the swim team and that your ex-girlfriend came to every meet. You used to have a cat and you have shitty taste in music, and your favorite president is FDR and you think the National Parks need more funding and protection. I know you like I know biology, like I know trigonometry, like I know how to build scenes and sets with lines and colors. You are such an intrinsic detail, such a piece of me. I wish I could forget.

Signed,

The Other Girl

 

Dear Boy,

You loved her, I know that too. You need her like your heart needs to beat and you don’t know how much I wish I could forget that. She’s good, she’s kind. She left you because she knew of me and you left me because I knew of her. She still doesn’t know about what was us, and for that, I am grateful. We’ve become friends, recently, she tells me that you want her back and tells me the shitty things you say to her. I help her with her French homework. We talk about religion and hot celebrities, and manga and movies and everything in between, and it makes me glad I decided not to hate her. Thank you for bringing her to me, but we can never be honest with each other.

Signed, 

The Other Girl

 

Dear Boy,

I listened to Taylor Swift for months and wondered what it would be like to touch you again. I was sad for a long time, you gave me anxiety and I gave you all my love. Being almost with you was an experience I’m not sure I would relive. You were my first almost-boyfriend, and, at least for now, my last. My friends pitied me, yours too, I actually made some from our ill-fated affair. At least I got something out of us, you’re still lonely. Part of me feels sorry.

Signed,

The Other Girl

 

Dear Boy,

You made me learn, I’m grateful for it. I may have been an island last year, but you forced me to step out in the worst way. I don’t owe you answers, you don’t need them, I’ll never send these letters, but here you are anyways.

  1. This was the first time you talked to me, I was kind of snappy that day, and it wasn’t your fault. I wear blankets to class in the winter because my shitty veins can’t keep me warm on their own.
  2. Yes, it was a hard project, but I worked hard on it, so I know I deserved the A I got, but it still was kind of you to compliment me on it.
  3. Thank you for calling my art cute, it was just a shitty doodle, but you acted like it was a masterpiece, I’m sorry for not believing you.
  4. I liked you too.



All these things said, you don’t deserve me. You shamed me in some of the worst ways, and I’m never crawling back to you.

Signed,

The Other Girl


End file.
